I got the news that my friend Clive passed away from a heart attack this past Wednesday.
I knew that as I grew older, I would eventually see the day where my friends would start leaving this plane of existence and I wasn’t entirely sure how I would handle it.
Clive and I have worked together since 2001 or 2002. He was the programmer on the website I worked on. We instantly connected through our love of all things in life…movies, memes, music. It was rare that a day would go by without a quote from Black Dynamite or some obscure 1970s movie that he would introduce me to.
On a professional level, after twenty years of working with him we operated on a symbiotic level. I would talk to him about what we would need and he didn’t really need a whole lot of explanation. He and I just understood what each other was saying and it didn’t need to be written out at length. It will be hard to transition to a world without him; one where I have to erase that relationship and start fresh with someone and explain things a bit more thoroughly.
He was a programmer who really thought about how a user would use the tools we were building. More often than not, he would think of cases I didn’t think about or build extra features into something and it just made sense. It’s rare that someone thinks outside the box when they are tasked with following some requirements document. It’s rare to find someone like that.
On a personal level, the ridiculous adventures that him and I have got entangled in are legendary and I love when either him or I would have the chance to recount these tales.
Here’s one of my favourite ones:
Fast Times at Ridgemont High
Very early on in working with Clive, we were talking about something and he quoted something from Fast Times at Ridgemont High. Being a 20 something year old fresh out of college, I had to admit that I didn’t understand the reference.
Clive: “Wait, you haven’t seen Fast Times at Ridgemont High?”
Me: “Nope.”
Clive: “I can’t continue to work on the website until you go watch this movie. Seriously. I’m not working on it.”
I had to walk over to my manager and explain the situation.
Me: “….and that’s why he won’t get any work done.”
Manager: “So you’re telling me all it will take is for you to go home and rent Fast Times at Ridgemont High and he will get back to work?”
Me: “Seems like that’s the case.”
Manager: “Well, time for you to head home then!”
I went home, rented the movie, laughed my ass off and went to work the next day, called Clive and said “All I need are some tasty waves, a cool buzz, and I’m fine.”.
I’m pretty sure he just hung up the phone with a smile on his face and went back to work.
The Blind Man who used the screen reader
Awhile later, Clive and I needed to get some accessibility checks down on our website. We heard about a blind employee who would go through our website and show us some pain points that they were experiencing so we could make it better.
We sat there with this guy using a screen reader for an hour. At the end of the hour he says “Well…there’s a few things that can be improved but you’re definitely one of the better sites I’ve tested.”
Clive and I walked out of there full of pride and he looked at me and said “Dude! Did you hear what he said? We’re not the shittiest website out there!”
High fives were exchanged and we walked out of there like kings.
Raccoon for sale
I don’t know all the specifics about this tale since I wasn’t around for it but supposedly the day of the Great Glebe Garage Sale he found a dead raccoon in his green bin. He sent me a photo of the green bin with a sign he put on it “Dead Raccoon – $5” or something like that. Haha! What a guy. There were a few people bewildered at that sight.
I’m sure I will add more stories as the years go by and they trickle back into my memory.
I am very sad to lose a good friend who I chatted with nearly every day. The past few years he had started visiting Thailand for two months during the winter with his wife Natalie and they had the time of their lives there. He would send me photos of dumb stuff he saw along the way and I always got a chuckle.
That’s what I’m going to miss about Clive the most. He was always looking for things that would make me laugh. I, in turn, did the same thing for him. I will miss watching Airplane and start getting into an hour long chat with him exchanging quotes from that movie.
I’m going to miss hearing stories of him sailing across the ocean with his Dad and his brother. I’m going to miss hearing stories about him flying a plane. I’m going to miss going to test something on the website and he snuck in something to make me laugh. I’m going to miss getting updates about his wife and daughter. He was super proud of everything they did and would keep me updated all the time as a proud husband/father does.
It’s only been a few days and everything feels pretty raw right now. There’s moments where I cry, there’s moments where I laugh, there’s moments where I just don’t really want to do much of anything. All I can do right now is to make sure his legacy lives on. I will do my best to continuing working hard but always with some some silliness attached to it.
I miss you pal. I hope you’re up there having fun on a motorcycle listening to some great tunes.
Update: I was asked to say something on behalf of Clive’s colleagues at work at his celebration of life. It was quite the honour. I have to admit that I was extremely sad in the days after he passed away but after receiving this mission something clicked in my brain and I just got to work and it gave me something to do. It wasn’t until I was driving home from the celebration of life that something in my brain clicked again and I was extremely sad. I guess if I have something to keep my mind occupied I can turn certain things off in my brain.
It was a beautiful Saturday afternoon at the Canal Ritz. I had never been there before and it’s really nice. The speech I delivered has some stories that you already read in the post above. Here it is for historical reference:
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My name is Ryan Palmer. I had the honour of knowing Clive for more than twenty of the thirty plus years he worked as a web developer on a variety of Government of Canada websites. Over the past decade, he was a senior developer on a website called Job Bank. Most of his colleagues in this room have worked with him during that time..
In the past week I heard his colleagues say things like:
“Clive was one of the most fun and energetic people I’ve ever worked with.”
“He was funny but kind, genuine and unforgettable.”
“He was the kind of friend who always listened, the colleague who always had my back, and the mentor who quietly shaped so much of my path.”
“He was a brilliant guy who could solve pretty much any problem you threw at him (usually after a bit of grumbling).”
Clive was all of that and more, but to me, he was the guy who introduced me to the movie Fast Times at Ridgemont High.
The year was 2002. I was fresh out of college and the junior guy on the team. He was working as a web developer through Public Works and my team was one of his clients.
One day I was chatting with him on the phone and he threw out a quote that I wasn’t familiar with.
“Wait…you haven’t seen Fast Times at Ridgemont High?” he says.
“Can’t say that I have.” I reply.
“Ryan…I can’t believe you haven’t seen this movie. That’s it, I’m done here.”
“Wait, what are you saying?” I ask.
“Until you see Fast Times at Ridgemont High, I refuse to do any work!”
CLICK.
Kids, back then, phones actually made a clicking noise when someone hung up on you.
I sat there for a few minutes and realized there was only one thing to do.
I went to my manager and explained the situation.
“You’re telling me Clive is refusing to work until you go see…what was the movie again?”
“Fast Times at Ridgemont High” I tell my manager.
A smirk crept over her face and she said “Well then. I guess you need to go and watch that movie right away, don’t you?”
And that’s the story of how I ended up renting Fast Times at Ridgemont High and spending the afternoon having some good laughs.
I called him the next morning, quoted something Spicoli said. He laughed and said “I’m back to work!”
That was what life working with Clive was. It was always some hilarious adventure. It’s as if he took every single situation that was presented to him and said “Now…how can I make this fun?” “What can I say to make people laugh?”
Later on, there was a moment where he and I had to get our website tested to see if there were any accessibility concerns. This basically means that we want to make sure that folks with a variety of disabilities can get information from websites without too much trouble.
One morning, Clive and I met up with a blind man using a screen reader to let us know if our website had any major pain points.
After an hour of sitting with this man, he finally says “Well boys, there’s a few things that could be improved upon but it’s definitely better than a lot of other sites I have to review.”
We walked out of his office and Clive grabs me by the shoulders and says “Ryan! Did you hear what he just said? We’re not the shittiest site out there! Let’s go have lunch!”
Clive was ridiculously funny, compassionate and hard working. He was one of those people that would look at the task he was trying to accomplish and try to figure out how to make it even better for the users. This is a rare trait. Most people just do what they are told and that’s that. Not Clive. He always tried to make things better.
Working with Clive for that long, we got to know a bit more about his life over the years. I loved his stories of sailing the Atlantic Ocean with his father and brother, or some wild situations he was in as a pilot. Speaking about being a pilot, any chance he got he would say to me “Ryan, I wish the pilot industry didn’t tank when I was younger because now I’m stuck here with you guys!”
In the past few years he was excited that his nephew became a pilot. We would be halfway through reviewing some document and he would say “Hey, did I tell you my nephew is a pilot now?” He was living vicariously through him and was quite proud.
Speaking of being proud, let us not forget his love for Natalie and Laura. I always loved when he would stop cracking jokes with me and talk about what new thing Laura was doing like being president of a knitting club or moving to British Columbia or the adventures Natalie and he were planning. I’m not entirely sure if Clive did any of the planning but I guess Natalie can tell me after this speech. He was very proud of his family and if you knew him well enough, he wanted to share that family with you.
I have plenty of stories to share about Clive. But everyone in this room has the same amount of stories to share. Friends, family, Clive’s colleagues…I can’t fit a lifetime of great stories into a few minutes. I encourage you all to celebrate Clive’s life by sharing stories with one another this afternoon.
This past week has been really hard. There will be hard days to come. Whether you’re a colleague, a friend, or a family member…you will wonder how you will get through it.
Then you will think “What would Clive say to me?”
He would say “All you need is some tasty waves, a cool buzz, and you’ll be fine.”
And for those of you who didn’t understand that reference, maybe you should go watch Fast Times at Ridgemont High and think of Clive.
Thank you.
There was an interesting interaction as I was leaving the celebration. A gentleman by the name of Gary told me that usually speeches bore him but mine was quite engaging (thanks Gary!). He also said that I have similar mannerisms of Clive. I thought that was interesting. Did I adopt certain mannerisms from Clive that I enjoyed? I supposed that building a personality is all about taking bits and pieces of interactions throughout your life and building a unique personality. It would be interesting to see if this was a common thought amongst others. If there is any truth to it, then I shall continue being a jokester for the rest of my life in honour of him!
