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Kids: “Dad, you are wearing a tie today!”

Me: “Yes, I have a presentation today.  I wanted to dress up.”

Sierra: “Is your presentation with the mayor?”

Last year I started scanning old slides of Lynn and Sue’s but I stopped once I realized I didn’t have all the slides and it would be best to have them all in order.

I finally got a hold of all of them.  It took a few hours to organize them into piles according to their datestamp.

I don’t know much about slides but I can only imagine that the datestamp on them is the date they were actually printed.

For example, you can see that in the top right corner there is Sep 78T3.  I have to assume that this means the batch of slides were created in September 1978.  I’m not entirely sure what the T3 means.  There are other batches that have T1, T2…some others don’t have any mention of a T.  I’ll have to contact some folks who might know the answer.

Putting them in order is an interesting puzzle.  For example, I’m organizing everything by datestamp, but in some cases I have doubles of datestamps.  There might be two slides that say 81-March001.  Now…what happened there?  Did they drop off two rolls of film and because they were processed on the same date, they come out saying it was done in March 1981 and they have the same sequence?  I’m not sure about that one yet…this just adds a bit more puzzle to decipher because now I have to figure out which photos go with which sequence.  If there is a wedding starting out on one of the slides marked Slide 1, then it stands to reason that the second slide should be a wedding photo as well.  So that will be an interesting adventure when it comes to it.

I really enjoy digitizing old media…slides, photo albums, home movies…it gives me a glimpse into the past and I’m sure it makes folks happy that they can see photos they forgot about in the past.

Ezra’s acro class

Sierra’s hip hop class

Sierra’s acro class

This fall, both kids wanted to try out dance classes.  Sierra even managed to convince us to sign her up for TWO classes which took place back to back.

The studio was deep in Orleans so it was definitely a quick ‘get ready, get eating supper, get on the road’ Tuesday night for us during the fall.

We typically brought Mia along for the ride which was fun.  We would always take turns requesting fun songs to play during the ride.  I do remember a particularly fun ride listening to the songs of Parry Gripp.

All these lessons culminated in the Christmas recital at the Shenkman Arts Centre in Orleans.  What an honour to grace their stage!  We even got to see what it’s like backstage.  I’ve always wondered after seeing a lot of concerts there.

I wonder what the story of these kisses on the backstage wall is all about?

Ezra’s changing room!  Complete with a mirror!

And a shower!

Backstage

 

The concert was super fun and while I don’t fully understand the world of dance, I do know that the kids worked really hard on learning all the moves.  They did really great.

Even though they did great, they both decided to pursue other activities in the new year.  I have to admit that we are a bit relieved.  The world of dance is…interesting.

We knew there would be a recital at the end, but they never bothered telling us up front that there were multiple recitals and you had to pay $30 a seat to go to each one.  Ezra was really not wanting to go to any of them…when we managed to convince him to go do it, then revised the schedule and was proposing he do two of them.  Forget about that!  It was hard enough convincing him to do one!

Costumes cost $100 each.  As far as I know, that wasn’t advertised when signing them up.  I could be wrong.  But all that to say, parents should know what they are getting into when they sign up for things.  A lot of parents don’t have the ‘inside scoop’ to all the costs associated with an activity.

At the end of the day, the kids know a dance routine and they did pretty good on stage for the Christmas recital.  Super proud of them!

 

It’s not often in life that you get asked to grace a stage a second time in your life, but it happened for me!  I would like to think that they really, truly wanted me to sing some Christmas songs for them again but I’m pretty sure they were just really desperate.  ;-). Haha!

Last year I had the honour of playing for the Optimist Club Christmas event in the village.  I was on the hook for a lot of work…an hour and a half worth of songs!  Both in English and French…some that I had never played or heard before in my life!  It was a large undertaking and I think I did pretty good.

Fast forward a year and they needed someone to play again but the gig was a bit more reasonable this time around…20-30 minutes and I would have another guitarist and drummer playing with me.  Brilliant!

Considering I had a few ideas bouncing around in my head of songs to play, I quickly assembled a setlist, shared it with the guys and we had a practice the week before and it was sounding pretty good.  It’s fun to play with other people who are pretty great musicians.

I have to rewind a bit and tell the story of going a bit overboard as soon as I got the gig.  I was excited to give something to the kids…I decided upon little egg shakers used for percussion.  On Amazon, you could get a bag of sixty.  I sat and thought about it and thought “What if more than sixty kids show up?!  I don’t want anyone to be upset!”  I ended up ordering 120 egg shakers for the event.  Vero had a good laugh at this.  Turns out that 35 kids took a shaker.  Ah bein.

Everything went great and it’s always a pure joy in my heart to make kids smile and laugh.  In another life, I wish I was on a show like Mr. Dressup or the Friendly Giant.  But this is the next best thing.  I didn’t mess up too much on the french songs and I was very proud that Sierra and Ezra joined in throughout the concert.

Here is a video of the concert.  Vero was nice enough to videotape it.  There are sections where it’s audio only so I put in a few photos here and there.  Enjoy!

 

https://www.dadcooksdinner.com/pressure-cooker-chili-mac/

 

Sierra: “Can you pass me a pillow Ezra?”

Ezra: “Here you go.”

Sierra: “Wait, is the smelly one?”

Ezra sniffs the pillow: “No, it’s not Daddy’s pillow.”

I got the news that my friend Clive passed away from a heart attack this past Wednesday.

I knew that as I grew older, I would eventually see the day where my friends would start leaving this plane of existence and I wasn’t entirely sure how I would handle it.

Clive and I have worked together since 2001 or 2002.  He was the programmer on the website I worked on.  We instantly connected through our love of all things in life…movies, memes, music.  It was rare that a day would go by without a quote from Black Dynamite or some obscure 1970s movie that he would introduce me to.

On a professional level, after twenty years of working with him we operated on a symbiotic level.  I would talk to him about what we would need and he didn’t really need a whole lot of explanation.  He and I just understood what each other was saying and it didn’t need to be written out at length.  It will be hard to transition to a world without him; one where I have to erase that relationship and start fresh with someone and explain things a bit more thoroughly.

He was a programmer who really thought about how a user would use the tools we were building.  More often than not, he would think of cases I didn’t think about or build extra features into something and it just made sense.  It’s rare that someone thinks outside the box when they are tasked with following some requirements document.  It’s rare to find someone like that.

On a personal level, the ridiculous adventures that him and I have got entangled in are legendary and I love when either him or I would have the chance to recount these tales.

Here’s one of my favourite ones:

Fast Times at Ridgemont High

Very early on in working with Clive, we were talking about something and he quoted something from Fast Times at Ridgemont High.  Being a 20 something year old fresh out of college, I had to admit that I didn’t understand the reference.

Clive: “Wait, you haven’t seen Fast Times at Ridgemont High?”
Me: “Nope.”
Clive: “I can’t continue to work on the website until you go watch this movie.  Seriously.  I’m not working on it.”

I had to walk over to my manager and explain the situation.

Me: “….and that’s why he won’t get any work done.”

Manager: “So you’re telling me all it will take is for you to go home and rent Fast Times at Ridgemont High and he will get back to work?”

Me: “Seems like that’s the case.”

Manager: “Well, time for you to head home then!”

I went home, rented the movie, laughed my ass off and went to work the next day, called Clive and said “All I need are some tasty waves, a cool buzz, and I’m fine.”.

I’m pretty sure he just hung up the phone with a smile on his face and went back to work.

The Blind Man who used the screen reader

Awhile later, Clive and I needed to get some accessibility checks down on our website.  We heard about a blind employee who would go through our website and show us some pain points that they were experiencing so we could make it better.

We sat there with this guy using a screen reader for an hour.  At the end of the hour he says “Well…there’s a few things that can be improved but you’re definitely one of the better sites I’ve tested.”

Clive and I walked out of there full of pride and he looked at me and said “Dude!  Did you hear what he said?  We’re not the shittiest website out there!”

High fives were exchanged and we walked out of there like kings.

Raccoon for sale

I don’t know all the specifics about this tale since I wasn’t around for it but supposedly the day of the Great Glebe Garage Sale he found a dead raccoon in his green bin.  He sent me a photo of the green bin with a sign he put on it “Dead Raccoon – $5” or something like that.  Haha!  What a guy.  There were a few people bewildered at that sight.

I’m sure I will add more stories as the years go by and they trickle back into my memory.

I am very sad to lose a good friend who I chatted with nearly every day.  The past few years he had started visiting Thailand for two months during the winter with his wife Natalie and they had the time of their lives there.  He would send me photos of dumb stuff he saw along the way and I always got a chuckle.

That’s what I’m going to miss about Clive the most.  He was always looking for things that would make me laugh.  I, in turn, did the same thing for him.  I will miss watching Airplane and start getting into an hour long chat with him exchanging quotes from that movie.

I’m going to miss hearing stories of him sailing across the ocean with his Dad and his brother.  I’m going to miss hearing stories about him flying a plane.  I’m going to miss going to test something on the website and he snuck in something to make me laugh.  I’m going to miss getting updates about his wife and daughter.  He was super proud of everything they did and would keep me updated all the time as a proud husband/father does.

It’s only been a few days and everything feels pretty raw right now.  There’s moments where I cry, there’s moments where I laugh, there’s moments where I just don’t really want to do much of anything.  All I can do right now is to make sure his legacy lives on.  I will do my best to continuing working hard but always with some some silliness attached to it.

I miss you pal.  I hope you’re up there having fun on a motorcycle listening to some great tunes.

 

Update: I was asked to say something on behalf of Clive’s colleagues at work at his celebration of life.  It was quite the honour.  I have to admit that I was extremely sad in the days after he passed away but after receiving this mission something clicked in my brain and I just got to work and it gave me something to do.  It wasn’t until I was driving home from the celebration of life that something in my brain clicked again and I was extremely sad.  I guess if I have something to keep my mind occupied I can turn certain things off in my brain.

It was a beautiful Saturday afternoon at the Canal Ritz.  I had never been there before and it’s really nice.  The speech I delivered has some stories that you already read in the post above.  Here it is for historical reference:

—

My name is Ryan Palmer.  I had the honour of knowing Clive for more than twenty of the thirty plus years he worked as a web developer on a variety of Government of Canada websites.  Over the past decade, he was a senior developer on a website called Job Bank.  Most of his colleagues in this room have worked with him during that time..

In the past week I heard his colleagues say things like:

“Clive was one of the most fun and energetic people I’ve ever worked with.”

“He was funny but kind, genuine and unforgettable.”

“He was the kind of friend who always listened, the colleague who always had my back, and the mentor who quietly shaped so much of my path.”

“He was a brilliant guy who could solve pretty much any problem you threw at him (usually after a bit of grumbling).”

Clive was all of that and more, but to me, he was the guy who introduced me to the movie Fast Times at Ridgemont High.

The year was 2002.  I was fresh out of college and the junior guy on the team.  He was working as a web developer through Public Works and my team was one of his clients.  

One day I was chatting with him on the phone and he threw out a quote that I wasn’t familiar with.

“Wait…you haven’t seen Fast Times at Ridgemont High?” he says.

“Can’t say that I have.” I reply.

“Ryan…I can’t believe you haven’t seen this movie.  That’s it, I’m done here.”

“Wait, what are you saying?” I ask.

“Until you see Fast Times at Ridgemont High, I refuse to do any work!”  

CLICK.

Kids, back then, phones actually made a clicking noise when someone hung up on you.

I sat there for a few minutes and realized there was only one thing to do.  

I went to my manager and explained the situation.

“You’re telling me Clive is refusing to work until you go see…what was the movie again?”

“Fast Times at Ridgemont High” I tell my manager.

A smirk crept over her face and she said “Well then.  I guess you need to go and watch that movie right away, don’t you?”

 

And that’s the story of how I ended up renting Fast Times at Ridgemont High and spending the afternoon having some good laughs.

 

I called him the next morning, quoted something Spicoli said.  He laughed and said “I’m back to work!”

 

That was what life working with Clive was.  It was always some hilarious adventure.  It’s as if he took every single situation that was presented to him and said “Now…how can I make this fun?”  “What can I say to make people laugh?”

 

Later on, there was a moment where he and I had to get our website tested to see if there were any accessibility concerns.  This basically means that we want to make sure that folks with a variety of disabilities can get information from websites without too much trouble.  

 

One morning, Clive and I met up with a blind man using a screen reader to let us know if our website had any major pain points.

 

After an hour of sitting with this man, he finally says “Well boys, there’s a few things that could be improved upon but it’s definitely better than a lot of other sites I have to review.”

 

We walked out of his office and Clive grabs me by the shoulders and says “Ryan!  Did you hear what he just said?  We’re not the shittiest site out there!  Let’s go have lunch!”

 

Clive was ridiculously funny, compassionate and hard working.  He was one of those people that would look at the task he was trying to accomplish and try to figure out how to make it even better for the users.  This is a rare trait.  Most people just do what they are told and that’s that.  Not Clive.  He always tried to make things better.

 

Working with Clive for that long, we got to know a bit more about his life over the years.  I loved his stories of sailing the Atlantic Ocean with his father and brother, or some wild situations he was in as a pilot.  Speaking about being a pilot, any chance he got he would say to me “Ryan, I wish the pilot industry didn’t tank when I was younger because now I’m stuck here with you guys!”

 

In the past few years he was excited that his nephew became a pilot.  We would be halfway through reviewing some document and he would say “Hey, did I tell you my nephew is a pilot now?”  He was living vicariously through him and was quite proud.

 

Speaking of being proud, let us not forget his love for Natalie and Laura.  I always loved when he would stop cracking jokes with me and talk about what new thing Laura was doing like being president of a knitting club or moving to British Columbia or the adventures Natalie and he were planning.  I’m not entirely sure if Clive did any of the planning but I guess Natalie can tell me after this speech.  He was very proud of his family and if you knew him well enough, he wanted to share that family with you.

 

I have plenty of stories to share about Clive.  But everyone in this room has the same amount of stories to share.  Friends, family, Clive’s colleagues…I can’t fit a lifetime of great stories into a few minutes.  I encourage you all to celebrate Clive’s life by sharing stories with one another this afternoon.

 

This past week has been really hard.  There will be hard days to come.  Whether you’re a colleague, a friend, or a family member…you will wonder how you will get through it.

 

Then you will think “What would Clive say to me?”

 

He would say “All you need is some tasty waves, a cool buzz, and you’ll be fine.”

 

And for those of you who didn’t understand that reference, maybe you should go watch Fast Times at Ridgemont High and think of Clive. 

 

Thank you.

There was an interesting interaction as I was leaving the celebration.  A gentleman by the name of Gary told me that usually speeches bore him but mine was quite engaging (thanks Gary!).  He also said that I have similar mannerisms of Clive.  I thought that was interesting.  Did I adopt certain mannerisms from Clive that I enjoyed?  I supposed that building a personality is all about taking bits and pieces of interactions throughout your life and building a unique personality.  It would be interesting to see if this was a common thought amongst others.  If there is any truth to it, then I shall continue being a jokester for the rest of my life in honour of him!

A little backstory on this one.  I was listening to Rebel Force Radio (best podcast ever) and Jason (host) at one point said something that really struck me: “Are the adult collectors the reason why kids don’t play with toys anymore?  They see us Dads keeping our toys inside boxes and glass cabinets and so they don’t feel that they can play with toys?  Are we the problem?”

This really stayed with me.  I was always wondering why my kids never cared to play with toys as much as I did when I was younger.  I was all about the action figures and Legos.

I sometimes wondered if it was because they have TOO many toys and it’s just overwhelming.  That’s not entirely our fault as parents, it’s just part of the ‘hand me down’ generation we live in where other parents pawn off their toys onto other parents.  It’s a good problem to have!

Anyhow, Sunday morning arrives and I’m editing some home movies and the kids come running into the office arguing about something.  It was something that I figured was not worth arguing about but instead of getting into the details I deflected completely and said “Hey, you know those Thundercats up on the shelf?  Do you want to open a couple?”

Their eyes opened wide and they were ecstatic!  I swear this was bigger than Christmas.

Out came a few Thundercats…I helped open them for them as I’ve seen how much they tear open boxes and I can’t handle it as a collector.  But there they were, having the time of their life with these figures…throwing them against the wall, figuring out which figure should be a villain and which should be a hero, grabbing a He-Man figure and throwing it into the mix…it doesn’t matter when you’re playing with action figures…it’s all about the action!

After an hour, the typical things happened.  Somehow we lost the head of one of the action figures (still can’t figure out how that happened), there are accessories all over the place, the figures have hit the wall and ceiling a few times…but it was the best Sunday morning I could ask for as a Dad.  I feel my love of collecting is winding down, or at least shifting to the point where I don’t really care about the condition of my stuff…I want my kids to develop their own love for things and if it happens to be the same thing I love in life, bonus for me.